blessed are the meek

Totally falling head over heels for guys here. There's still the guy from the facebook pictures, for whom I've decided to move on and away from since, though he's friendly, doesn't show any interest whatsoever. I got this picture of him though that made me think twice--still makes me think twice, make that thrice--about abandoning the guy. He cleans up really nice, I think. Also, I am uber-biased.

This other dude I met at the volunteer program. His name is Ryou, and I call him Ryou-kun when I talk to him, or when I whisper his name in the tender moments when I am alone and I remember his smile. He's 22, bit on the buff side like a young rugby player, but with a damn charming smile and a gentle, affectionate demeanor. Imagine having a sleepy bear that keeps nuzzling at you--that plus a charming smile. Haven't seen any fur to justify the metaphor, but for everyone's benefit (mostly mine), I intend to get a closer look.

We hung out after the volunteer event last sunday named "living together": sort of an AIDS mixer but with sharing and videoke and alcohol. It was fun and meaningful at the same time. My job was to play this 8-note tune on the xylophone after every song (much like the fanfare that plays when they post your score at videoke). My timing was awful since I had no idea when the songs would end, and often I interrupted the host. But hey! I'm a hapless foreigner and am easily forgiven.

We ate at this nearby place afterwards and talked (me with my garbled japanese) about the usual gay stuff that gay boys talk about when they're not busy looking for other boys. Such things as when you came out, top or bottom, have you ever tried it with a lit candle, the usual.

He came out at 17, to his little brother first; and his versa-though he prefers bottom; and not yet--mentally noted.

There were four of us, 2 sitting opposite while Ryou-kun and I were sitting beside each other. At some point, we talked about who among the volunteers was my type. I like my man slightly meaty, so when I got to Ryou-kun, in my assumption of how the Japanese subtly do it, I expressed my appreciation for him by not saying anything in particular--a thoughtful "sou desu ne(hmmm, is that so.)" was uttered, I believe--and with a bit of apprehension. Ako na ang puro't dalisay.

Ryou-kun asked me suddenly "Kareshi ga aru no?(Do you have a boyfriend)?" with a look of earnest interest. I was transfixed, but managed to say no somehow. The temptation of not saying anything at all and just have that magical evening pass with his Japanese eyes looking into mine definitely crossed my mind.

We moved on to this other guy "Tomacho-kun" who introduced me to the comic fest (of questionably content) that I enjoyed and am forever grateful for. I said he was "hontou ni omoshiroi (truly funny)" since he's a bit gruff, outspoken, but cute as a button. He was bit on the buff side too, and to that Ryou-kun concluded with an exasperated "Ah, Tomacho-kun".

I have the urge to correct his understanding of who I really liked, and I intend to on volunteer day this Friday; that and the actual volunteer work, of course.